The Church of England’s ruling synod has decided that all bishops must be at least 20% Jew, but there are further steps to take before they can be ordained.

Despite criticisms that this was ‘almost as stupid as Christianity itself’ mad churchey types everywhere agreed that the current system was anti-Semitic.

Rowan Williams remarked ‘if it’s good enough for Jesus it’s good enough for bishop[s]’, to which newly bishopped Aaron Adelstein replied ‘Jesus? That tawdry street performer?’.

Since the Catholic church allowed a non-celibate Muslim, ‘Randy’ Rawahah, to be The Pope last yeah the Church of England has been under increasing pressure from pressure group’s such as Steven Spielberg’s ‘The Church of Hitler more like’. This follows Spielberg’s recent revelation that the Ralph Fiennes character in Schindler’s List was actually a subtle allegory of The Church of England.

But while this flippant parody fizzles out it is important to stress that there are arguments on both sides… of the argument:

If The Church of England can’t be racist, sexist, homophobic, anti-Semite, idiotic,… etc, who can be?

I’m satired of this shit,